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Thursday, September 12, 2013

My heart literally hurts from how much love I have for this tiny human. Sometimes I get caught up in myself, in this feeling that my life is lacking, that I forget how fucking lucky I am. I have this little girl who tells me she loves my nail polish, even though I'm wearing socks. I have someone who notices when I wear my hair different, someone who tells me 'I love you' when I need to hear it the most. Yesterday, I had to wake her up from her nap to take her to dance. I haven't seen her for three weeks. I creaked open her door and was automatically soothed by her wave machine. The same sound that I used to rock her to when she could fit in the crook of my arm. I sat on the side of her bed and gently rubbed her back. Without even opening her eyes, her tiny lips curled up and she whispered "Hi Em". so. much. fucking. love.

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Just Keep On Keeping On


I lay awake at night haunted by the sound of seconds fading, hoping that if I hold my breath long enough they would stop and wait for me to catch up. They don’t, they never do and eventually seconds turn into minutes, minutes turn into hours, hours turn into days and just like that, half of my life is lost, taunting me with it’s goodbye alongside those ticking seconds. I feel like I am stuck in this little world, with no control. I feel dead.. numb. I want to paint, turning dull canvases into something beautiful. I want to see the world, the good and the bad. I want to meet people, and learn their stories. I want to dance around on a beach lit with candles. I want to lay down in the middle of the road counting stars until my heart beats with the rhythm of the crickets. I want to kiss the people that I love and be able to let go of the people who bring me down. I just want to throw my hands in the air and for god’s sake breathe the fucking air. 

I just want to feel alive. 

I think that this is the reason that I am so entranced with photography. For that mere second that I glance through my lens, secondsminuteshoursdays collide, and my world seems like the whimsical place that I wish to live. 

cakes.



elusive protection




souls


charlotte






ring around the rosie